Rin mistakes Gai for a boy up until they're assigned genin teams, which is kind of terrible perception for a kunoichi in training.
To be fair, she's only seen glimpses of Maito Gai from afar. Gai's weird, loud, and not very pretty for a girl their age. She also has ginormous eyebrows, an awful haircut, and wears the most hideous green tights and orange leg warmers like her dad. Rin has never spoken with Dai before, but her mother insists he is a great man for raising Gai on his own since his wife's passing. Rin met Kakashi's father once before his untimely death. Sakumo had been a tall, soft-spoken man with handsome features much like his son. She seriously hopes Gai doesn't grow up to become a mini-copy of her father.
Rin’s dream of being on the same team as Hatake Kakashi comes true. Gai gets paired up with pervy Ebisu and Genma, who looks half-awake on the best of days. They are the only two kunoichis in their class year, and Rin's mother advises her to make friends with Gai because girls need to look out for each other in this line of work. Despite what they teach at the school, it is still very much a man's world out there. Rin's thinking of taking the traditional medical route, but Gai clearly has other thoughts.
She sees her running laps around the village day and night, occasionally popping up to yell at Kakashi who mostly ignores her attempts to challenge him while Rin and Obito watches on in confusion. Gai also cries a lot, which she says are Manly Tears of Youth. But she's clearly not a man.
Rin thinks it's probably due to the lack of feminine energy in the Maito household.
Then Gai's dad dies, and some things somewhere along the way change between Gai and Kakashi. Rin catches Kakashi sprinting madly through the village one late afternoon on his hands, Gai laughing and yelling behind him. He's still the same expressionless cool kid the next morning they meet up with Minato Sensei, so Rin's not sure if she hallucinated the whole thing. After all, she has a pretty active imagination.
Rin finds a pair of torn leg warmers by the training posts in Field Three. The sturdy wooden dummies are etched with splinters and grooves from repeated hits. Rin touches the dent where Gai has worn the wood shiny and smooth. It's still damp with sweat. She picks up the leg warmers and takes them home.
"Girls need to look out for each other in this line of work," Rin repeats her mother's words the next time they cross paths. It had taken a better part of Rin's week to patch the rips in Gai's leg warmers, but she's managed to do it with neat, near-invisible stitching. She sees the look of open wonder on Gai's face for a brief moment before the other girl yanks her off her feet in a bear hug and thanks Rin, complete with tears and the sudden appearance of the glittering sunset background.
"Yosh! I shall do a hundred laps around the village as a sign of my gratitude!" Gai shoots her a thumbs-up after tugging on the leg warmers. She jogs off, still teary-eyed but beaming.
Rin watches her go and thinks that green jumpsuit looks awfully thin for the blistering cold of winter. Maybe Gai could use a new scarf and a warm jacket as well...
-
They quickly become friends after that, and it's only a few weeks in when the topic of Hatake Kakashi comes up.
"What about him?" Gai frowns.
"Don't you think he's handsome?" Rin blushes at the thought. All the other girls around their age think so.
Gai shrugs bluntly, "I haven't thought about it."
"But you're always chasing after him for a fight," Rin points out in confusion. "Isn't it because you have a crush him?"
"A crush?" She snorts loudly, "On Kakashi? Of course not. He's my Eternal Rival, you can't have a crush on your rival, Rin. I chase after Kakashi because he is the best in our class, and once I finally defeat him, I will be the best."
"So no one, then?" Rin sighs, watching her wrap her fingers in clean bandages. Gai's hands are huge. Big-boned, as Rin's mother once mentioned, large knuckled and heavy-looking, rough and full of strength. Just like the person they are attached to. Gai's apartment isn't filled with the items of an ordinary kunoichi. There's a pair of nunchucks sticking haphazardly out of a bamboo clothes hamper, a crooked wooden dummy with a splintered post, various weapons shoved hastily into her closet full of jumpsuits to make room for Rin to sit, and books, tons and tons of books. There's also a solitary plant sitting in a pot by the window in a pool of sunlight. It looks similar to the one Kakashi keeps on his kitchen counter.
She takes a sip of her tea and winces at how bitter it is. Gai doesn't really know how to cook at all.
"I have to fight Kakashi next week," Rin looks down at her lap and fidgets with her fingers, "I don't know if I can—"
"He's weaker on his left side," Gai interrupts abruptly and flops gracelessly down next to her. "Distract him with something and then, kapow!" She punches a fist into her palm and Rin flinches at the sound. "Don't let Kakashi win just because you like him, Rin." Gai flashes her a toothy smile and winks, "want me to teach you a few moves?"
The techniques somehow work, and their training exercise ends with Kakashi sprawled on the ground at her feet. Obito's eyebrows are making a valiant attempt at escaping his forehead, and Sensei is smiling as he watches Kakashi pick himself back up, dusting blades of grass off of his pants, still coughing a little from Rin's unexpected punch.
Rin’s face feels hot, but a tiny part of her is thrumming with pride when she meets Kakashi's dark expressionless eyes. She doesn't look away this time.
"Fantastic job, Rin," Sensei is the first to recover. She feels the gentle squeeze of his hand on her left shoulder, "Let's move onto the next exercise of the day."
Obito's clapping like there's no tomorrow, his eyes shining with reverence. Rin thinks she spots a flicker of muted amusem*nt in Kakashi's blank face.
"Been hanging out with Gai?" He murmurs, low enough only for her ears as they set off after Sensei into the trees.
Rin purses her lips at the words, a sudden fierce protectiveness burning in her chest for her ridiculously loud friend with the heart of gold. "So what if I have?"
Kakashi pauses, as if blindsided by her unexpected boldness. He's the first to glance away, giving a one-shouldered shrug as he picks up a stray kunai from the grass and spins it expertly through his fingers. Rin notices they are as calloused as Gai's.
"Good," He says simply and meanders off after Obito.
-
Puberty hits.
Obito's voice breaks one morning and Sensei has to hide his amused smile behind his palm when her teammate flushes horribly and starts coughing. Kakashi sprouts five inches practically over-night, but Rin is secretly pleased he's still half a head shorter than Gai who has also filled out in the chest compartment. Rin's not sure if it's because of the green tights or what, but people are starting to stare. Gai is oblivious to the sudden attention and does the same exercises she always goes through.
Rin occasionally catches Kakashi watching her. He's mostly expressionless, so Rin can't tell what he's thinking. But Gai's the one that makes him smile the most often, these quick secretive flashes of amusem*nt that she misses ninety percent of the time because Gai's off being her usual loud and oblivious self. Rin and Obito also make Kakashi smile some times but it doesn't quite feel the same.
Rin's mom, who used to be a field medic back in the day, teaches them both how to bind their chests and deal with their monthly bleed. Rin sadly doesn't really need the bindings, but at least Gai can now jump and kick without all the boys in their training ground stopping what they're doing and zeroing in on her chest area.
They improve together and settle into a routine. Kakashi makes dinner and invites them over. Rin always takes Gai's side in their stupid little contests, Obito cheering Kakashi on the opposition. Gai manages to keep the lead for a whole week. Rin buys her a potted mini evergreen fern as a celebration present.
-
Then, Obito dies, and the bright colors that had saturated her world fade away.
Rin's whisked away by Kirigakure nin and turned into a jinchūriki for the Three Tails, and she knows it's unfair to make Kakashi do the ugly deed, but there's no other choice. She doesn't want to destroy her village. It's home to her mother, Gai, Sensei, and Kakashi.
People Rin vowed to protect.
The pain is breathtaking and deep. Rin's vision is starting to flicker, but she summons the last bit of her strength and smiles at Kakashi. He looks like he's in shock. Of course he is, she'd impaled herself on his Chidori. There's so much she wants to say and so little time. She's going to have to break that promise to go to the summer fair with Gai next month. Rin still hasn't gotten around to picking up a present for Sensei's birthday, and Kakashi... Who's going to keep him company when she's gone?
"I'm sorry," Rin tries to say, "tell Gai..."
He doesn't tell Gai.
She's a mess at the funeral. Kakashi doesn't shed a single tear. Minato looks worried about his lack of emotions, but Sensei has never been really good at dealing with feelings. None of them are. He and Sensei are the only ones left in their genin team. The eye Obito left him throbs like a phantom heartbeat in Kakashi's head.
He's pretty sure that somewhere out there, Obito is crying.
Overhead, the rumbling storm finally breaks as rain pours from the heavens.
-
Kakashi cuts ties with Gai all together afterwards. People are starting to whisper about him behind his back, calling him a friend-killer. He doesn't want Gai worrying he'd do the same to her.
Sensei recommends Kakashi for a spot in ANBU, and for a while, the mindless repetition is good. Takes his thoughts away from Rin's ghost and the crippling guilt. Minato tries to cheer him up by asking him over for dinner three times a week, but Kakashi's super awkward around the man's wife and doesn't talk much. Besides, he kind of feels naked without the ANBU mask now.
The years tick by. Kakashi rises to the rank of captain. Most of his teammates are terrified of him.
Minato Sensei's next attempts to prod Kakashi out of his shell comes in the form of protecting Kushina. He fails them too, and Sensei leaves behind an infant son with the Nine Tails sealed inside it.
He briefly runs into Gai during a mission a few months later. She tries to talk to him, but Kakashi kills their target and orders his team to retreat. Still, the tendrils of temptation have lodged their hooks in and Kakashi spends the next week tailing his old friend around the village. Gai is still Gai, loud, boisterous and oblivious. She drags an old lady across the street she'd just crossed and spends a good fifteen minutes babbling apologies to the furious grandmother, and Kakashi almost breaks character despite his ANBU training. His team suspects he's plotting to kill Gai. Kakashi doesn't bother correcting them.
-
Kakashi's always been a light sleeper growing up, but it's evolved to the point of severe insomnia where he's going for days without any rest. It's making him sloppy, that, and the mounting stress of joining ROOT and leading a team of highly skilled killers.
Gai is the last bit of light in his life, a blindingly bright and obnoxiously loud light, but still... Oh, she also snores like a backed-up tractor, which strangely puts Kakashi at ease. He knows watching Gai sleep from the tree outside her apartment window is creepy even for Kakashi's standards, but he finds it oddly comforting. A small slice of normalcy to remind him that the world outside of ROOT is still there. Sometimes, he even falls asleep and wakes to the sound of bird calls. Getting pooped on is something Kakashi is willing to overlook.
He does this for the rest of summer. Gai, the dolt, seems otherwise oblivious to his presence. She's still loud, cries at random commercials on TV, destroys most of her attempts to cook, and forgets to shut her curtains a lot. Autumn carries with it an underlying chill in the air. Kakashi's breath is starting to fog in the night air when he finds a stray kunai buried in his usual tree branch. There's a solitary key attached to the end of the weapon. He stares at it for a very long time, feeling sheepish.
The key finds its way around Kakashi's neck with the rest of his identification tags, but he doesn't dare use it.
Then, one morning, Gai runs up toDanzōoutside the Hokage's office and demands a spot on Kakashi's team, and everything derails from there.
He shows up uninvited on her window sill one early winter morning, still decked out in that awful ANBU uniform. Gai can smell fresh blood on him, but she suppresses the familiar prickle of worry that rises out of reflex and keeps watering her solitary fern.
"Please stop," Kakashi says.
"No," Gai returns firmly.
"You shouldn't put it out on the sill, it's too cold," He mutters, "It'll die."
"You shouldn't be in ROOT," Gai parrots back, scowling, "it's too dark. You'll die."
Kakashi heaves an annoyed breath under the mask. Gai thinks she knows why he's mad. Word has no doubt spread among the ranks of her clumsy attempt to join them, probably laughing their asses off at the sight of her getting down on her knees in front of the Sandaime and then later confronting Lord Danzō the way she did. Gai doesn't care about their opinions. The wonders of growing up constantly being mocked and laughed at for merely existing differently. She's got skin as thick as her eyebrows, and nowadays, not much can hurt Gai anymore.
"Don't be an idiot," Kakashi says, frustration in his flat voice.
"If you don't quit, I'll find a way in," She tells him, peering straight into those slitted eyeholes on the blank mask. "You know me, Kakashi. I always accomplish my goals."
In response, he vanishes in a puff of smoke. Gai huffs. Kakashi is as stubborn, if not more, than her. Unfortunately, he's also got the emotional intelligence of a banana peel.
Gai glances at Rin's fern. It does look like it’s starting to droop from the cold. Scowling, she scoops up the pot and brings it inside where it's warm.
It takes a good solid year before Kakashi finally gathers the courage to unlock Gai's apartment door with the key around his neck. There's a thick warm blanket and an extra pillow laid out on her ancient creaky couch.
It's the best night of sleep Kakashi has had in probably a decade.
He wakes up to breakfast on the small tea table and a neat note. Gai has perfect handwriting from years of diligent calligraphy practice. Kakashi takes a cautious nibble of the egg and gags. It tastes like burnt rubber. The only thing Gai knows how to make is spicy curry, and last he'd heard, that has already sent Iruka to the hospital twice with acute hemorrhoids.
As a form of repayment for letting him crash at her place at night, Kakashi takes over the meal prep.
They don't talk about it.
He puts in his resignation for ANBU a few days later. Gai still leaves out the blanket and pillow for him that evening, so Kakashi reckons he's been forgiven for the years of worry and anguish he's put her through.
-
He's back to doing regular missions, which is both a relief and embarrassment when Kakashi overtaxes himself one time and has to stay in hospital and wait for his chakra to replenish. He annoys Iruka so much the other man finally relents and assigns him on a routine D-rank mission with Gai, who has been tasked with tracking down perverts/bandits that have been bothering a remote village to the east of Konoha.
They have to go as civilians, and Kakashi gets kidnapped the first night they arrive. One of the burly men dramatically rips open his robes. Kakashi watches as the excited smile evaporates into mild confusion under the moonlight.
"Wait a minute, you're not a woman!" The kidnapper gapes at his very flat chest and the clear absence of boobs.
"Ohhh, you wanted the woman," Kakashi blinks up at them, "that would be my partner in the green."
"Impossible!" Another bandit points a wickedly curved blade at his face. "That was the manliest man I have ever laid eyes upon!"
"Is it the eyebrows?" Kakashi manages to ask before he's knocked unconscious again.
He wakes to swaying rhythmically over Gai's shoulder. She's still wearing the kimono she came in, but it's torn in several places and he can sort of make out the shape of her ass from where he's flopping like a windsock over her arm. It's making him nauseous, his concussion, not the ass part. It's a very nice ass, Kakashi thinks with detached fascination, very toned and muscular and very Maito Gai.
"Ugh," says Kakashi in leu of greeting.
"Kakashi!" Gai booms, clapping his backside in merry acknowledgement.
"What happened to the hooligans harassing the village women?"
"They will do no more harm," Gai assures him, jogging faster. Kakashi screws his eyes shut and breathes through the dizziness. "I sent a tortoise to lead the village chief to the tree I left them hanging in."
-
Iruka gives them another mission near Snow Country where they have to go undercover as a couple. Kakashi thinks it's payback for the most recent food incident that landed him in the hospital for two days, but the man never learns his lesson when it comes to Gai and curry, so it's not exactly Kakashi's fault for not intervening.
Only this time, the Lord of the house has a strange fascination with Gai, who is clearly Kakashi's new wife (they even have the paperwork to back it up) and spends the majority of his time trying to flirt with her. Most of his attempts go completely over Gai's shiny bowl-cut head, but it's still irritating to watch. Kakashi is immensely relieved when the entire clan turns out to be crazy cultists that try to sacrifice Gai like some bashful weakling virgin to achieve immortality.
She smashes their alter, kicks the Lord through three stone walls, and laughs at the virgin part. It's not until they're within Konoha's borders that Kakashi realizes—
"You slept with someone?"
Gai's sprinting ahead by a few yards, so he channels some chakra into his legs to catch up.
"We're adults," Gai shoots him a bright sunny smile, "You probably have much more experience than me, Kakashi!"
"Yes," He lies, scowling under the mask, a sudden spike of intense anger toward Gai's mystery man, "loads."
"So cool and popular," She says, half teasing and half in admiration.
"Who was it?" Kakashi presses after a pause. "Genma? Ebisu?"
Those were the two idiots on her genin team. Gai swats at the back of his head.
"They're like my brothers, Kakashi!"
He never does find out who.
"What are you reading?"
"p*rn."
"This really is just erotica," Gai concludes one sunny afternoon. They're both crouched in a tree, tailing an old woman for a C-rank mission. She skims another dozen pages and wrinkles her nose. "Why?"
Kakashi shrugs and snatches his book back, flipping it open to where it had last left off with the male protagonist washing up naked on an island of exotic women. It's good stuff. Jiraya-sama really knows his audience.
"All the while maintaining a straight face no less," Gai murmurs, looking disturbed. He smirks behind the mask, amused by the reaction despite the loudest mouth in the village now knowing his secret.
"I will keep silent about your strange hobbies, Dear Rival!" Gai vows solemnly, squeezing his shoulder with a large hand. Kakashi lifts an eyebrow at her.
"It will ruin your cool and aloof image if your admirers find out you are a pervert, Kakashi," She tells him, dead serious.
-
Sandaime tells Kakashi to keep an eye on Minato Sensei's kid. Gai finds out the very next day.
"Why are we stalking that small blond child?" Gai asks in her normal booming voice despite Kakashi's insistence on stealth. She doesn't do inside voices. It instantly outs their hiding spot to Naruto, who hurls a sizable rock their way. It is impressive, considering he barely reaches Kakashi's hip in height.
The stone bounces off the side of his face as Naruto takes off running down the empty street. Kakashi turns in the thorny bush and gives Gai the brunt of his stink eye.
-
"He looks malnourished, Rival," Gai shouts at him one mid-morning, kicking irritably at Kakashi who is shamelessly taking up the entirety of her only couch on his rare day off. He flips a page of his precious p*rn and hums. "You should bring him some hearty vegetables and protein. Naruto is a growing boy, he cannot just survive off of ramen and cow's milk dangerously close to the expiration date."
"Hmm..."
"Kakashi, are you listening?" Gai demands, whisking away his favorite Icha Icha Paradise and glaring down at Kakashi. He wonders briefly if this is what it feels to be married. The ceiling fan whirls behind Gai's head, the blades helicoptering dramatically. He snorts at the sight and rolls out of the way before she can land a decent punch and rupture one of his kidneys.
"Go shopping with me then," He says, half-draped over the back of the couch now.
"I'm busy with spring cleaning, Rival," She huffs, flipping the entire tea table over and running the old vacuum underneath. It spews out more dust than it collects. Kakashi sneezes beneath his mask and makes a tiny note in his endless list of things he would never get done (if not for Gai chasing him down) to buy her a new vacuum.
"Fine, let's make it a challenge," He drawls, watching Gai beat the stuffing out of some throw pillows. "The first one who delivers the vegetables to Naruto's apartment wins."
The ancient vacuum clatters to the floor, forgotten. There's fire in Gai's eyes when she turns to him. "You're on, Kakashi!"
Tricking her into doing his errands is almost effortless, he thinks as Gai shrugs on her flak jacket and bolts out the door with the Pakkun-shaped money bag Kakashi had given her as a birthday present, shiny black hair gleaming in the sunlight. He shoves his hands in his pockets, leaps off the third-floor banister into the busy street below, and follows at a much more sedated pace.
The weather is beautiful, and it's a nice day for a walk.
-
In an unexpected turn of events, Gai befriends Naruto.
She's the only person in a while to have looked at him with anything other than disgust and scorn, which naturally leads to Naruto becoming a huge fan of Gai's sudden declarations of youth, energetic impromptu hugs, and the shedding of manly tears. They adore each other dearly.
Kakashi thinks he might be a bit in over his head with these two joining forces.
-
"Look, my Most Esteemed Rival!"
Kakashi peers cautiously out of his apartment window one morning and freezes. Minato Sensei's kid is wearing one of Gai's hideous green jumpsuits and orange leg warmers. The colors clash horribly with Naruto's bright blond hair. They're both waving maniacally up at him with identical toothy smiles. Sensei's probably turning in his grave right now. One of Kakashi's neighbors, watering flowers a few feet away from the dynamic duo, side-eyes him with unreserved judgment.
"I don't know them," Kakashi calls down at the neighbor, chin in hand. The old man doesn't look convinced. It's probably time for Kakashi to move anyway, preferably out of the village and off the map entirely.
A few months later, Gai takes on her first genin team. Kakashi, who had just failed his group yesterday, is reading in a nearby tree and keeping an eye on them when the startled birds take flight at the loud sound of her happy sobbing. Gai's got all three little urchins in a hug that looks more like a headlock, and there's a kid with equally shiny black hair in the group crying with her. It's startling how similar they look, or maybe it's just the eyebrows. If Kakashi wasn't sneaking into Gai's apartment to sleep every night, he'd almost be suspicious the kid was hers.
Predictably, Gai gives her students green jumpsuits as welcome presents, but only Mini-Gai puts them on religiously. And now there are three of them, The Noble Beasts of Konoha (with Naruto cheerfully tagging along in a hideous orange version of those awful tights), running laps through the village and disturbing the general peace.
-
The whole genin thing is probably contagious because Kakashi falls to the same mysterious illness the very next year and passes a team of his own: the emo Uchiha kid, the pink-haired girl crushing on said emo, and Naruto, who upon seeing him immediately points an accusatory finger in Kakashi's expressionless face and yells—
"Ero-Sensei?!!!"
Kakashi probably should have foreseen this development after Gai magnanimously green-lit the kid calling her Gekimayu-sensei.
God, he hates children.
-
"No, you can't kill them, discard their bodies in a ditch, and blame Hidden Mist. They are your responsibility now," Gai says sagely, plucking the tempura out of Kakashi's bowl and dropping it into her mouth. "You should be happy, Dearest Rival! Our precious Naruto is in your team!"
"'Our precious Naruto' keeps calling me a pervert to my face," Kakashi complains, stealing a piece of Asuma's fish tofu when he's too distracted flirting with Kurenai to notice.
Gai chews thoughtfully and swallows.
"He's not wrong though."
Lee is her Most Youthful and Precious Student, but Gai's soft spot is reserved for the fierce little girl on her team — Tenten, who reminds her a whole lot of Rin. She shares this secret with Kakashi during the Toro Nagashi festival. It is a day of remembrance, a celebration of family and ancestors, and the soft glow of the lanterns light up the evening as they meander down the river. The children run ahead, pulling and pushing.
"Hey," Kakashi sticks his elbow in her side. "Want to see who can scoop up the most goldfish?"
He points to one of the open-air stalls where a small shallow pool has been set up with wriggling gold and orange fish. It's a scam. The flimsy paper nets usually break when they meet water, but that's what makes it fun and a worthy challenge from her Eternal Rival.
"Yosh! Challenge accepted, Rival!" She shouts, clapping Kakashi's shoulder and nearly sending him sprawling face-first to the ground with her strength.
Kakashi wins by one fish, putting him in the narrow lead once more. By the time their minute is up, the vendor is purple in the face. Gai has twenty in her baggie and two dozen civilians cheering them on. All her students, along with Kakashi's, took her side, much to his annoyance. Gai's entire left sleeve is soaking wet but Kakashi is the one that smells like raw fish. They escape with their winnings, their students laughing and yelling along the way.
"What do we do with these?" Kakashi asks, holding up his baggie. They have a combined whopping forty-one goldfish and nowhere to put them.
Gai thinks for a moment before meeting his eye, "do you trust me?"
"Always," Kakashi replies with ease.
-
The Hatake compound is overgrown with weeds when they sneak inside. It's two in the morning and cold moonlight spills unbroken through the empty courtyard. There's an extensive man-made pond system in the back.
Gai has only been here once in her lifetime. Sakumo-san had maintained a beautiful water garden with large koi swimming lazily in the pond. All the fish have died by now, but the water is still there. Kakashi is a silent, immobile shadow beside her, so Gai takes him by the hand and pulls Kakashi over to the water. She pours the tiny goldfish into the pond and crumples the bags in her palm. They sit there for a while, quietly observing the little creatures acclimate to their new home.
It is the last day of Obon, and Kakashi hadn't bothered lighting any lanterns in his old family home. Gai hadn't either because she'd just come back to the village that afternoon after a month-long mission. They are the only ones left of their clans. She doesn't know if the spirits of their ancestors have found their way home this year or if it is too late, but Gai still has a few matches from the festivals earlier, so she pulls one out, flicks it against her thumb and lights a lone lantern on the small stone bridge stretched over the water.
The flame dances in the mild summer breeze, dragging Kakashi's elongated shadow over the grounds of his ancestral home. He's still watching the wriggling fish in the water, so Gai wanders over to join him. Kakashi lays his head on her shoulder and they stay until dawn.
Hatake Kakashi is injured after a run-in with Itachi and Kisame.
Gai charges in and kicks Kisame so hard he bounces thrice on the surface of the water like a skipping stone, and he sort of falls in love.
"You have strange tastes," Itachi tells him in a tea shop one afternoon while they wait for their order.
"She is a most handsome woman," Kisame rubs his bruised jaw fondly at the memory, "the strongest I've met so far."
Itachi chews on his dango in quiet judgment. Kisame doesn't mind the silence.
"Naa, Itachi-san, do you think she will remember me?" He persists.
His partner swallows the last dango, sets the bamboo stick aside, and takes an elegant sip of tea.
The answer, sadly, is a resounding no.
Kisame finds out two weeks later when she punches him and nearly breaks his face in two. Itachi's busy torturing his little brother as his only form of brotherly affection somewhere in the trees. The white-haired masked man loitering behind the absolute powerhouse of a woman makes a point of catching Kisame's gaze mid-battle and smirking, the smug asshole. There's no way she'd settle for a weak scarecrow like him, Kisame thinks dismissively, she'd snap him in half with those magnificent thighs.
"Who?" Leaf's Noble and Sublime Green Beast asks, bewildered, when Kisame introduces himself again once he's caught his breath. "I'm not good with faces."
No matter. She'll remember him this time.
Unfortunately, he's proven wrong yet again, but that's a story for another time.
Their students grow up into youthful adults, full of passion and energy unlike Kakashi. Gai is ridiculously proud and orders them a fresh batch of green jumpsuits to celebrate, including one for Gaara, who had rapidly become one of Lee's closest friends despite the chūnin exam fiasco. The days go by, Kakashi sticks around like an aloof house cat, only intervening when Gai's close to poisoning everyone with her cooking. That unfortunately is one of the thing that had not gotten better with age.
Then, things take a drastic turn downhill, and Kakashi asks her to be his second-in-command for the third legion in the Fourth War. Gai accepts without hesitation.
And it turns out that Obito is actually not dead and despises Kakashi for taking Rin's life. Gai has a lot to say to Obito, but it's Kakashi's time. All she can do is her usual — having his back.
Neji has a few close calls. They all do, but Gai pushes on because Naruto, Kakashi and the rest of them need her to. Madara, for all his terrible acts so far, praises her stamina and strength. He has never met a kunoichi can go this many rounds against him.
It's ironic that he's one of the few men to ever notice that she is female. Not many people do. She's not beautiful like Anko and Kurenai. She towers over most men, and yet the constant mocking of her appearance have left near to no marks. Gai thinks of her father, always optimistic despite the whole village's animosity. He raised her as best as he could and left little inspirational notes in her bento box every day. And Rin, with her quiet caring nature, was strong in ways Gai never was. She still has that pair of patched-up leg warmers in her box of Most Precious Items along with the fern that Rin bought for her. Gai's dear students, Naruto and Sakura, Genma and Ebisu, Iruka... and most importantly of them all — Kakashi.
They are her people. The ones that have cloaked her with love, and the ones Gai will to sacrifice her life to protect.
She is going to miss them, Gai thinks fondly as she opens the Eighth Gate.
-
Gai comes to in a hospital bed. Well, a cot in the middle of a drafty tent really. She can make out a steady stream of rain water leaking from the top end of one of the weight-bearing poles.
"One rule, Gai, we had one rule," Kakashi's flat voice says somewhere on Gai's left.
She's bandaged up to her eyeballs, so she can't exactly move. Everything hurts, but Gai manages to curl her lips back enough for a signature smile. Her rival's fluffy white head slides into view, and Kakashi does not look amused. In fact, he looks kind of livid. Blank-faced, but with fire in both eyes.
"I'm not dead. Rule not broken, Rival," She points out hoarsely, "Besides, it would have been an honor to die protecting what is precious to me."
Kakashi looks like he's about to whip out a 200-page slideshow of just how wrong her assessment is when Lee's shiny bowl-cut pops up beside him. Her Most Youthful Student's lower lip wobbles violently, large globs of tears already running wet trails down his bruised cheeks. Tenten and Neji are both looming impatiently over the Copy Ninja. Kakashi exhales in defeat and shuffles to make space for them. He doesn't go far though. Gai feels the dip of the cot next to her ear where he's placed one elbow, close enough to touch but not quite.
"My beautiful Spring Buds!" She greets them brightly, and Tenten smiles unsteadily, but it quickly turns into muffled, body-wracking sobs when she sees the extent of the damage. Neji puts an awkward arm over her shoulder, and all three scuffed members of Team Gai shuffle carefully over to their sensei.
"Wounds heal," Gai reminds them.
"And we are stronger for it," Lee finishes for her out of habit. Gai beams at him, but he only cries harder.
"No tears or snot on the fresh bandages," Kakashi snaps, swatting at Lee. "Don't you all have work to do?"
"Don't you?" Neji shoots back and Gai feels her best friend shrug.
"I'm on break," He lies effortlessly. Gai can tell he's bullsh*tting. She's able to sniff out Kakashi's lies like one of his ninken, but she elects to keep her silence this time. Her most precious people are gathered here, safe and relatively unharmed.
They stay for a while before Sakura rushes in and kicks everyone out. Gai slips into a restless sleep and wakes to the sight of Kakashi hovering next to her cot, his eyes glued to her face. She hopes there's not fresh drool on her chin.
"Where's your pervy book?" Gai asks, finally putting her finger on the missing detail.
He chokes out a laugh at the question and buries his face in his hand. "Must've dropped it in all the chaos."
"Don't worry, I shall buy you another set when I regain the use of my limbs," Gai promises, and some of the residual tension in Kakashi's shoulders fade. The slim line of his throat bobs under the black mask.
"Don't ever make me scoop your crumbling body out of a muddy ditch again, ok?" He finally says into his hands after a silent pause, voice no longer steady or flat. "Gai, you're..."
The only one left.
Now that Obito is truly gone. That realization amplifies the hollow ache in her chest.
"I promise, my Eternal Rival!" She says as sunnily as she can muster. This is their routine. He spirals into self-doubt and depression and she beats, kicks, and drags him out of it with her signature brand of stubborn manic energy. "Did we win? Is it over?"
It works like a charm, because Kakashi rolls his eyes and groans. "Yes. Put those thumbs down before you pass out."
"I will not! For I am Konoha's Noble Green Beast, and my passion and youthful vigor can prevail over—"
"Why am I so attracted to you?" Kakashi wonders out loud, his chin cushioned in one palm as he watches her declaration with an exasperated look on his face.
"Why are you what?" She must have misheard that last part. He squeezes his eyes shut, takes in a deep breath and sighs like a weary man triple his age.
"I said, 'why am I still friends with you?'" Kakashi clarifies finally, sounding pained.
"Because you finally think me as cool and hip as you, Rival?" She beams, teeth pinging in the low light. It's a perfect smile, if Gai is to be honest. She's managed to pull off the impossible, even with such poor lighting.
There's something strange in Kakashi's expression when he takes her in, bandaged and barely alive but still full of youthful cheer, and admits quietly, "no, Gai. You have long since surpassed me in the cool and hip department." His eyes crinkle in a tired smile, and she adores every little line gathering there. They are signs of age, yes, but also proof that he's strong enough to have survived this long. "You, my lady, are the hippest and coolest. I concede my crown."
"Not until I officially win our next competition, Kakashi," Gai insists, and in a burst of strength, manages to pump a bandaged fist into the air. It hurts intensely but it is also satisfying. As long as she is alive, her body will always bend to her will, and she has an endless amount of will. Enough for the both of them in fact. Gai knows she'll be up and running, and whipping Kakashi's ass in the field in no time.
He looks like he's going to say something incredibly rude and ruin the moment when Sakura sticks her head inside the medical tent and tells her former sensei they're looking for him to help down in the destroyed battleground. Kakashi glances at Gai again, that strange look back on his face.
"Go, I will still be here when you get back," She tells him.
"You’d better," He mutters, brows drawn down again, "get some sleep. Don't do anything stupid, Gai. I'll bring food next time."
"Curry? Extra spicy please."
"Not a chance," Kakashi shoots her down with merciless ease. "Heal first, then we can talk."
Then, he does something out-of-character and leans down to brush a rain-damp masked kiss on her exposed forehead. This close, Kakashi smells like old sweat and blood, and that unique sharp clean scent she's come to associate with him growing up. Somewhere behind Kakashi, Gai hears Sakura knock over a supply stand. He recoils at the sound and quickly retreats out of the tent, stiff-legged and awkward-looking, leaving Gai to ponder if Kakashi had hit his head particularly hard after she'd passed out.
She reminds Sakura to check her sensei for any signs of concussions. Much to Gai's confusion, the girl rolls her eyes so hard they almost get stuck in her head.
-
Gai loses the leg.
The medical staff help install a prosthesis, and she reassures the children she will be up and running in no time. Lee cries, which makes her cry, and Tenten starts sniffing, too. Neji's eyes are suspiciously red-rimmed when he abruptly excuses himself and jumps out the window. Kakashi pops by with Sasuke in tow one day. There's a weird little reintroduction. She doesn't understand why Kakashi wants her approval about the boy, but she gives it anyway.
The day she's scheduled to be discharged, Tsunade-sama drops by personally. As it turns out, the damage from opening the Eighth Gate has destroyed Gai's chances of ever conceiving a child. It's not as devastating as she had anticipated. The news doesn't hurt, it just leaves a dull sort of emptiness. The truth is Gai hadn't expected to even survive opening all eight Gates. Besides, she thinks, no one is foolish enough to want to marry a barren woman with her looks.
Kakashi insists on wheeling Gai out himself. Lee is sobbing hysterically behind them, Sakura patting his back in a useless attempt to comfort him. Kakashi's been bringing Gai three meals a day in neat little packages that look like Tenten's doing and taking care of Their Most Important Fern. Oh, she's also received fresh flowers from Ino, a brand new shogi board from Shikamaru, cartons of ramen from Naruto that Sakura promptly tossed out...
In all honesty, Gai doesn't need biological children of her own. She's already raised over a dozen freakishly strong kids with her emotionally stunted friend Hatake Kakashi who will officially be taking on the mantle of the Sixth Hokage!
It is the utmost honor and an accomplishment she would never surpass, but Kakashi doesn't seem all that eager and keeps shirking his duties in favor of hiding in Gai's apartment and religiously reading his p*rn novels.Gai had gotten him a new set of the books as soon as she could walk on crutches, much to Tsunade-sama's disgust.
-
That year's Toro Nagashi festival is a particularly heavy event. They have lost so many people. Gai remembers to light the lanterns in the Hatake and Maito compounds this time and is pleased to find that the fish they'd dumped in the Hatake pond years ago had grown to the length of her hand. Gai has famously big hands.
Do not worry, Sakumo-san, your son is safe and well, She thinks respectfully and lights the lanterns one by one. Kakashi lingers behind, slouched in the doorway with his hands in his pant pockets, which looks very cool and hip. Except for the fact that he's no longer a teenager, and the posture is horrendously bad for his spine.
She tells him that, and Kakashi stares at Gai for a long hard moment. Then, he strides over, pulls his mask down around his chin, and presses his mouth to hers. Right there, in the old Hatake family home. His lips are soft, and Gai's heart stumbles a beat when the still-lit match burns her fingertips.
It's all very...unexpected.
Kakashi takes office on a sunny morning in Spring. It's worse than he anticipated. Shizune and the Nara kid are the ones actually running things. Kakashi just signs endless stacks of scrolls Shikamaru hands over while the pot-bellied pig Tsunade kept around during her time as Hokage judges him with its beady little eyes on a silk pillow nearby.
Genma and Ebisu show up one day, both yelling something about Kakashi having to prove his worth before they'll even entertain the notion of letting him have Gai's hand. He slams the door in their stupid faces and sends both men off to Suna for a month just because he can now.
The ANBU guarding Kakashi are probably laughing their asses off at his fumbling attempts to actually ask Gai out. Every single damn time ends up with them pelting down the mountain side or some other form of their crazy challenges. Even Naruto's starting to shoot him pitying looks and offering to pay for Kakashi on their weekly ramen dates. Yamato has the balls to mock him one time, so Kakashi banishes him to Suna as well.
A Suna-nin shows up two days late with a politely-worded message from the Kazekage that essentially boiled down to: QUIT IT. WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF SPACE.
Itachi turns up in the village with his weird-looking partner from the Hidden Mist in tow. Sasuke puts on a long face, but Kakashi can tell he's secretly delighted when Sakura immediately throws Itachi into the hospital to deal with his multitude of health issues. On the plus side, Gai still has no recollection of the blue fish man vying for her attention. The downside, Kakashi has to pardon them for their help in the recent war.
As it turns out, reading a lot of steamy p*rn doesn't help with the actual wooing bit of the relationship.
It's honestly false advertising.
-
The Hyuga Clan name one of the newborn girls after Gai. Her emotional sobs are deafening throughout the naming ceremony. Kakashi is grateful for the protection of his mask when the child joins in on the chorus of wailing, and it almost becomes too difficult to maintain a straight face.
After, Neji corners the Sixth Hokage and asks shiftily for advice on expressing romantic affections for a particular classmate of his. Kakashi inquires if it's Lee just to see the angry vein pop in the Hyuga boy's neck. He unfortunately probably has less experience in flirting than Neji, which is kind of depressing, but Kakashi gives Gai's student his blessings anyway.
A few days later, Tenten drags a blushing Neji over to his office by hand, Lee cheerfully in tow, and offers to help him out with his Gai problem. They shake on it in secret. Then, Tenten proceeds to tell him that they have literally been dating for years. She also calls Kakashi a bonehead to his face, and orders him to get his sh*t together.
Gai is surprisingly busy these days.
Kakashi is famously bad at attending the events he's supposed to be present at and Shikamaru ends up dictating a lot of it to her. Kakashi does seem guilty about it, because ANBU mysteriously appear one time Gai has to climb six hundred steps up to the Temple of Flames to bear witness to a ceremony for the New Year. She refuses their aid and invites the four masked men to jog with her. No one accepts, and the kid in the Fox mask immediately tattles to the Hokage, who abandons his meeting with the Village Elders and shows up to berate Gai. She does successfully goad him into racing up the steps with her.
Kakashi loses by two seconds.
They are 86 to 85, with Gai one point ahead for now.
Her leg hurts too much to walk on the next day, but it's still worth it. The Spring of Youth is not just a physical manifestation, it is a state of mind.
In retaliation, Kakashi assigns a misty-eyed Lee to guilt-trip Gai. Two minutes into Lee fidgeting on the seat cushion like he's sitting on needles, he spills the beans that Tenten and Neji are a thing now. Gai pulls her Most Precious and Dear Lee to her heaving bosom, and they both burst into happy tears that scare off the resting birds outside Gai's apartment window.
Still hiccuping hysterically, Lee wrings his distressed hands and stutters, "G-Gai-sensei, there's s-s-something you need to know about Hokage-sama."
-
"Gai, I picked up a fresh batch of the medicinal ointment from Sakura today," Kakashi says the next evening he's home, "She wants your feedback on the new formula."
"Will do!" Gai replies brightly, unstrapping the prosthetic leg and breathing a quiet sigh of relief.
"Need some help?"
Gai always refuses, but Kakashi asks anyway.
"Yes," She says this time and watches in slight disbelief as Kakashi goes about prepping the bindings and medicine. He cleans his hands, scoops the correct amount from Sakura's glass jar, warms the thick cream between his palms, and drops to his knees in front of Gai.
Kakashi has pale beautiful hands with long slender fingers. He has killed so many people with those hands, but they are painstakingly gentle against the tanned skin of Gai's scarred thigh.
For the longest time, Gai had the feeling that Kakashi was not entirely there, that there was an indivisible divide she could never hope to cross. But the ghosts of the past have finally relinquished their grip, and the man crouched on the hardwood floor applying medicine to her ruined leg feels very much present in this moment.
His hair is getting long, she notes absently and brushes the loose white strands away from his forehead without thinking. Kakashi glances up, his dark eyes crinkling in a faint smile when they meet hers. A memory shakes loose. Rin had mentioned once, a long long time ago, that he has only ever smiled at Gai like that.
"Like what?" Gai had asked, unable to comprehend the gravity of Rin's words at the time.
Like this, she realizes now.
"Eternal Rival!" Gai blurts suddenly, butterflies exploding in the pit of her stomach, up past her heart and into her throat, "I-I challenge you to a legal union between two consenting adults!"
Kakashi freezes before letting out a skeptical chuckle. "Did you seriously just dare me to marry you?"
Gai flushes hotly. "Eh, yes?!"
"Can you not make everything a competition? Lee blabbed, didn't he?" He groans, sitting back on his haunches and peering at her with mild exasperation. "I had a whole thing planned, Gai. Naruto made a banner, there was going to be a surprise party with all the kids present. Neji and Hinata were going to sing."
"What?! That sounds so hip and cool!" She wails, fisting his shirt, "NOOOOO!!! I ruined your Wonderful Display of Impassioned Youth, Rival!"
"Please don't call me that in bed," Kakashi says weakly, "and you have to make it up to me."
He then proceeds to kiss her.
Gai kisses him back this time.
As it turns out, Naruto made two banners. Just in case Gai refused.
The alternative reads: CHEER UP, ERO-SENSEI! THERE ARE LOTS OF OTHER THINGS IN THE SEA! with a misshapen doodle of a crying Kakashi on the bottom left corner and some rainbow paw prints courtesy of Pakkun.
Kakashi clearly should have sent the kid off to Suna with Yamato when he had the chance.
"Yo."
Iruka looks up from his stack of files and grimaces at the sight of Kakashi. Also seated behind the administrative desk, Kotetsu elbows Izumo and jerks his chin at him as a potential source of fresh gossip.
Iruka rolls his eyes and asks, "How can I help you today, Hokage-sama?"
"I told you not to call me that," Kakashi sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose and waving a vague hand, "I need forms."
"What kind of forms."
He leaned in and lowered his voice to a bare whisper, "The kind you fill out for a marriage application."
Kotetsu gasps loudly in the background. Iruka and Kakashi simultaneously elect to ignore him.
"It looks like...you're already married," Iruka finally mutters after a pause, flipping through files like a professional. Both Kotetsu and Izumo gasp this time.
Kakashi blinks, "Wait, what?"
"Says it right here," Iruka points at the records. They both scan the forms with Kakashi's familiar chicken-scratch, Kotetsu and Izumo hovering over their shoulders. "Oh," Iruka's the first to break the silence, "you were supposed to submit a nullification form after that undercover cult mission with Gai, and you never did."
"I forgot..." Kakashi murmurs, staring at their signatures. The parchment paper is yellow with age. "Huh, how about that."
"You also haven't paid three penalty fines from—"
"Let's not dwell on the past, Iruka-sensei," Kakashi cuts him off quickly.
"How is lazy-ass Hatake the one with the longest and most stable relationship out of all of us?" Kotetsu complains, his arm slung over his best friend's shoulder.
"Looks like he didn't even know he was in one," Izumo pointed out savagely.
"Pack your bags," Kakashi tells the irritating duo, "you're both headed to Suna."
"That's an abuse of power!"
"Congratulations, Hokage-sama. Let us know when you've decided on a date for the long-overdue wedding reception," Iruka smirks at him before straightening and calling to the person standing in-line behind Kakashi, "Next!"
"Seventeen years?" Gai exclaims one evening as they are getting ready for bed. "We've been lawfully married for seventeen whole years?!"
"Mmm," Kakashi agrees distractedly over her shoulder, his bare arm draped over Gai's torso. He's half-way through the latest Icha Icha book. Gai had stood in line for three hours to purchase a signed copy for him that morning.
"You're a terrible husband," She decides, elbowing him in the neck.
"Maa, I have the rest of our lives to make up for it, don't I?" Kakashi murmurs, his eyes crinkling into crescent moons as he smiles and tightens his arms. Gai thinks about it for a moment.
"Start by helping with the dishes tomorrow," She tells him.
The next day, Kakashi chips four out of their five plates and obliterates Gai's favorite tea mug, but at least the food is delicious.
-FIN-
